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Successful domineering strategies in romantic couples conflict

Publication

Abstract

Domineering in romantic relationships - the ways romantic partners impose their will - is an integral and fundamental part of relationship functioning. However, little is known about the behavior that romantic partners use to dominate.

This study explores the variability of behavioral domineering strategies in couples. In a laboratory setting, we interviewed and videotaped sixty long-term couples, living together for at least one year (mean 3), average age of 25 years (19 to 36).

The main experimental situation was the Relationship drama, where couples re-acted their typical conflict interaction with as high accuracy as possible. We used open codes to qualitatively analyze verbal and nonverbal behavior of partners during 3-12 minutes of the Relationship drama.

Consequently, we selected codes ascribed to behavior of one of the partners that directly preceded and lead to his/her situational dominance and categorized them into one or a few domineering strategies for each drama. Finally, particular domineering strategies from individual dramas were categorized into general domineering strategies.

We identified 5 direct(Argumentative, Aggressive. Creation, Persuading, Peaceful coercion), and 3 indirect (Sabotage, Insidious, Aggrieved) domineering strategies, used both in defensive and offensive contexts, except for Sabotage (defense only).

We conclude that in real-life disputes of romantic couples, we can find several frequent and influential domineering strategies, overlooked by the traditional socio-psychological literature, as Peaceful coercion, Grievance or Sabotage, which are prosocial or indirect and do not require higher power-base. A better understanding of the variability in domineering could help to improve psycho/socio diagnosis and therapy.